Food for Thought

There are two different New testament text families comprising about 5,400 manuscripts. They are the Textus Receptus and the Alexandrian texts. The Alexandrian texts were written by Origen and Eusebius who were both gnostics and heretics. These texts represent only ~3% of the total 5,400. They do not agree with each other, are totally mutilated and have been corrected thousands of times. On the other hand, the Textus Receptus comprises ~97% of all manuscripts and 90% of those agree so strongly that they form their own unique text - the Textus Receptus. The KJV is the only Translation done exclusively from the Textus Receptus in the last 400 years. Just something to think about.

How to Have a Happy Marriage

These are my notes from my message at our Valentine's Day Banquet here at Calvary Chapel Lima.

Illustration: I was told as a young man before getting married that if I wanted to have a happy marriage, I had a choice to make. I could choose to be right or I could choice to be happy. To this day, I am a happy, happy man.

The Institution of Marriage

Cf. Genesis 2:18-24

The Fall

The Temptation (3:1-13)

Curse on the Serpent (vv.14-15)

Curse on the Woman (v.16)

Curse on the Man (vv.17-19)

Notice in v.17a “because you listened to your wife”.

In other words, “Adam, you chose to listen to your wife instead of to me.”

Notice in v.16b “your desire shall be for your husband, but he will rule over you.”

This means that the desire of the woman will be to rule over her husband.

Love vs. Submit

I find it interesting that the Bible never directly tells a man to submit to his wife, but instead repeatedly tells him to love her.

I also find it interesting that the Bible never directly tells the woman to love her husband, but instead repeatedly tell her to submit to him.

Why? – It all goes back to the Fall (the Garden of Eden).

The bottom line is that men have a hard time loving and women have a hard time submitting.

The interesting thing is that herein lies the key to a happy marriage!

If the husband would love his wife unconditionally, she would submit.

And if the wife would submit to her husband unconditionally, he would love her.

The problem today is that most couples are so worldly orientated that they must be deprogrammed.

In our society today, love is always conditional and “submit” is a dirty word.

And yet without both, one cannot be a Christian.

The Church and Christ

The marriage should be modeled after the relationship that Christ has with his Church.

A preacher can’t even read these verses without cringing today.

Cf. Eph. 5:22-33

Pearls of Wisdom

With all of this in mind, I just want to just give you guys some words of wisdom tonight.

My precious wife and I have been married for 23 years and I’ve learned a few things during that time that I can share with you.

Honesty

Always be totally honest with each other about the past, the present and the future.

Never ever lie to one another no matter how much it costs.

A relationship is built on honesty and trust.

Once that is broken, there is not much left.

Finances

In regards to money, always agree up front with how much each can spend without the others consent.

Money is the number one reason given for divorces.

Things Not to Do

1. Never Judge - You may think you know, but maybe you don’t.

Pro. 18:13 “He who gives an answer before he hears, It is folly and shame to him.”

2. Never Put-down each other.

3. Never refuse to forgive and forget.

The Bible says that love keeps no record of wrongs.

4. Never Criticize.

Criticism should be helpful and not hurtful.

Eph. 4:29 “Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers.”

5. Never compare your mate to someone else.

6. Never purposefully cause a fight.

7. Never be blind and deaf to the needs of each other.

8. Never use sarcasm and jokes about your spouse.

Words are like bullets.

9. Never ignore each other.

10. Never fail to express appreciation for each other.

11. Never ignore the In-laws.

They are number three of the list of reasons for divorce!

12. Never over commit yourself to others at the expense of your family.

Keep your promises even if it hurts!

13. Never be unwilling to admit that we are wrong.

Jas 1:19 “Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath:”

14. Never go to bed angry.

Eph 4:26 “Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath:”

There is nothing wrong with being angry, but if left unaddressed it will become sin.

15. Never nag.

Pro. 21:19; 27:15-16a

Some Things to Do

1. Listen to each other

Jas 1:19 “Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath:”

God gave us two ears and one mouth for a reason.

Defense Mechanisms to effective communication

1. Joking

2. Attacking

3. Pulling back

2. Respect each other

She is your queen and you are her king!

Men demand respect more than women.

A survey not many years ago found that the majority of men can live without love but not without respect.

3. Men, always be a gentleman. (Open the doors for her!)

4. Women, always be a lady. (Stand there until he does!)

5. Always talk to each other.

Read 1 Cor. 13:4-8a and place your name in the text every time you read the word "love".